Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Boobs speak an international language.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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