im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize