I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
