I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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