nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
