butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
