So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
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