Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
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