You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
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