Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize