either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
