How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
