It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
