Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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