I'm lost and stupid without you.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
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