Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
