I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
the liver wants what the liver wants
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Randomize
