Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
