Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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