So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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