i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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