dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
