she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
