he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
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