i need an iv and a liver transplant
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
