You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize