Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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