Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
porn star boner night. come get it.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Randomize
