whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
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