Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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