i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize
