...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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