i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
