My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
