Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Randomize
