Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
