Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
