it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
