so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
