i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
