So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Randomize
