I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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