I swear she didn't look like that last week.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
