Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Randomize
