I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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