I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize
