im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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