I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
people are starting to question the shark bite story
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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