Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
