At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
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